Can a Lesbian Quiz Answer the Question? By Patricia Cheney

Are you confused about your sexual orientation? Have you tried one or all of the lesbian quizzes on the internet trying to figure yourself out? If you have, you probably still aren't sure. If you haven't don't waste your time. The only real way to determine your sexual orientation is to look deep inside yourself. The answer lies within you...in your heart you probably already know what that answer is.
If you are seeking out quizzes and questioning your sexual orientation, something must have happened to make you do that. That is the first place you should start your inner search. Were you attracted to someone of the same sex? Did a lesbian scene in a movie or book turn you on? Ask yourself if it was a one-time thing or if it has happened before. The more attractions you have had, the more likely you are lesbian.
Along with examining your feelings toward women, you also have to think about how you've felt toward the men in your past. If you have been attracted to men, try to determine if your feelings for women have been stronger. Also take a look at the number of attractions of each sex you have had. If there are only 1 or 2 men you can think of, but several women, that should tell you something.
In fact, the most confusing aspects of determining your sexual orientation will probably center around your relationships with men. Because sexual orientation is theorized to exist on a continuum, you may lean heavily toward lesbianism, but still have an occasional attraction to a man. Typically, the attraction will be of shorter duration and less intense that with women, however. Even more confusing, it is possible for some lesbians to enjoy a sex with a man.
The most important thing to remember is that physical sex is not the hallmark of lesbianism. The most important factor is romantic attraction. In short, falling in love. If you have fallen head over heels, crazy in love with a woman, if you can't get her off your mind, you probably don't need a quiz. You probably already know and are trying to confirm it.
If you have examined all these issues and still spend significant time and emotional energy in confusion about your orientation, it might be time to consult a professional to help you sort things out. It is best to find a therapist or coach who specializes in sexuality and who you can feel com comfortable with.
This article was written by Pat Cheney, MBA, a life coach specializing in coming out in adulthood and mixed orientation marriage issues. In addition to working with couples who choose to stay in their MOM, Pat works with gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgenders who are transitioning out of marriages or are coming out in midlife. Her approach is balanced and sensitive to the difficulties of midlife transitions. Pat's coaching practice is located on the web at discoveringpride discoveringpride - Additional articles on this topic are available at her blog, discoveringprideblog.wordpress discoveringprideblog.wordpress
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